What's the opposite of a petty thief?

Someone in Chicago stole 120 tons of road salt from a storage facility just outside of the city in Aurora. That's the equivalent of 6 semis full of road salt. How does someone steal that without anyone noticing?

A nerdy Super Bowl party

On election day, one of Wes's colleagues is hosting an Election Day Party. We're actually having it at our apartment since we border Grant Park, where Obama is hosting his election night gala. Wes's colleagues has suggested a variety of drinking games (for those neither pregnant nor nursing): drink every time Obama wins a state (this colleague is an unabashed Obama supporter), every time the term "maverick" is used, or every time we hear the phrase "the best political team on television."

Wes said this will be like "a nerdy Super Bowl party."

Misplaced modifier

On the local evening news, one of the newscasters said something about a local official "locating gang members with increasing intelligence." When I shot him a quizzical look, Wes correctly identified the grammatical error and corrected it. The official, with increasing intelligence, was locating gang members. Ah, yes.